Weekend blahs

I love Saturdays. Even though I only worked 2 1/2 days this week, it still was so great to have the weekend here. I'm feeling much much better (although I'm still coughing), and I have the energy and enthusiasm I need for life. Whew!

A had a friend spend the night last night, and it was so fun to listen to the boys giggle all night (literally...I had to tell them to go to sleep at 2:30am). He doesn't get a chance to do that very often, so it was great for him. Then today he had a football game, and we just got back. He swears he recovered a fumble, too, although I'm not sure I saw that play ;) But, the boys won, and their amazing enthusiasm for the game made it so fun. Honestly, without kids, I think I would forget how to be so incredibly happy and carefree!

J had a soccer game today, too. She ran hard, and looked good. It was a very warm day for spectating, though....80*F for fall soccer and football? I'll take it....especially knowing what's just around the corner. I LOVE summer weather, and am dreading the coming winter!

And R is doing great being a spectator. She's such a little social bug...both games today she found boys and girls her age to socialize with. No wonder the third child is often known as the social one...what else would she do during the big kids games?

As for me, I'm going okay. I'm so lonely, and I know that sounds like a whine. I'm sorry. But weekends are hard, because I don't have my friends at school to talk to, and I really want to be out there dating and having fun, but it's just not there. Maybe after the divorce is final it will pick up. That's what I keep telling myself, anyway. Be patient and it will come. But I can't help but think maybe I need to move home to have a social life. I had one there. I had friends I could call and go out with every weekend. Maybe Kirksville is not where I'm going to start over. I know there should be things I could do too, but I don't know what at my age to do. That is not a cop-out, I really don't know. Bar hopping does not sound attractive, although I wouldn't mind going on a date to a bar. I'm not very athletic, although I like guys that are (hehe). I remember hearing if you just do what you love, you'll meet someone. Hmm...I don't see many guys in the library, nor do I think I want a guy who is as much of a bookworm as I am! But then again, maybe... I guess the really big deal here is that I don't want to necessarily meet my future mate (if there is one out there) yet. I just want and need someone to spend time with, and tend to enjoy male company. I miss the easy companionship I had with E, and even Tim and I sometimes had/have good times together. But both of those relationships started because of high school, and I'm just not there anymore...thank goodness!

I do know I have one child who really is happy here, and moving will be very difficult. I have another child who is happy here, but probably could and would be just as happy back home. And a third child who would be happy in Paris, probably. Again, I don't know. Just random thoughts.

So...sorry about that. Just my thoughts. My divorce is still not final, and I don't think even has a D-date anymore. I'm so tired of it. We are currently fighting over visitation, which seems very silly to me since he went 2 years with very little time with them. I guess it made him realize how precious they are. If only he could have figured that out before February!

I'm really glad I have my health back, and my kids are healthy. I am surviving and thriving even. I love my job, and have a fabulous class this year. Thank goodness for that! I'm still loosing weight, so yeah me. In two weeks, I get to go home for a breast cancer awareness walk for my friend, Aimee, who has conquered cancer at a very young age. I'm looking forward to honoring her, and seeing everyone. My life IS good. I need to remember that montra and repeat it often!